Saturday

Another life celebration and this was a wonderful experience, also. Vickie and I met up with James and Benny (in the box) about noon:

...boarded "The Dreamer" with the others and went out into the harbor. There were twenty of us,plus the captain and mate:

It was a perfect day: just warm enough, only slightly breezy, with blue skies and lovely sun. On the way out, which took about twenty minutes, we sang to Bob Marley and others, talked and laughed, got to know each other, and enjoyed the scenery and the little appetizer buffet (there's Benny over on the right, in the basket):

 A few random shots:

When we got out to what I assumed is the dedicated scattering area, the basket was brought over to the cutout by James and his sister. Benny's urn was in the middle, covered with rose petals: 

I was surprised to see that, rather than ashes being thrown to the wind, the whole basket was lowered down to the water. While it sank, the pedals floated gently on the surface:

Then, each person was given a flower sprig to drop in, after which the captain maneuvered the boat so the flowers circled around the pedals. It was a lovely and moving ceremony and when I dropped my flowers on the water, I surprised myself by starting to cry. I was thinking of my brother, Frank. 

We circled around for maybe ten minutes, then headed back to shore for the luncheon. It was at the yacht club (where BCNN used to meet) and by that time, it was after two and we were starved. At each place, there was a program and an angel and remembrance keepsake: 

There was also, I was happy to see, a champagne bucket on each table. A server came around asking if we wanted a dry or a sweet. We got the dry and it was so good. We toasted Benny, then people were asked to cite their relationship to Bennie, then we ate. Some artifacts around the room:

Above: Some of the citations he received after forty years in Ventura County Behavioral Health:

Above: Some items from on his retirement party; Vickie had been there.

Above: Vickie seated on the left, James; his niece, and I standing; two other Crayton relatives seated.

The luncheon was good--I ate too much--and we lingered over dessert before leaving about 4:00. When we got home, Vickie and I sat in the car for a good 45 minutes talking over our ideas and beliefs. Our concentration was on subjects of good and evil, sexual orientation, truths and fallacies, and the feelings of guilt that seems to be instilled in so many, often, thanks to the influence of religion. 

After the past two days, it occurred to me how much I enjoy the variety of people I know, not as servants and underlings, but as friends and acquaintances. Black, white, Latino, Asian, gay, young and old, sick and well, I want them all in my life. 

Of course, I love most of all having my family in my life. Today, I'm looking forward to lunch at Lake Casitas with two of them.