WEDNESDAY

Hey, it turned out to be a pretty fair day. However, it wasn't all ups, it had some downs. To be specific, my dilemma about the acting class. Suzy and I meet today and I still haven't decided if I want to take a full part or not. Well, I'll figure it out.

El got here about 10:20 and we drove to Oxnard to see Jim. She dropped me off at the door and said she'd be back in an hour. I had made turkey sandwiches for Jim and me, with a Spritz for him and an IPA, of course for me. Yes, I know alcohol is not permitted at Granny's Home Center.  but I just don't care, so shoot me.

We ate on the patio and it was a fine sunny day. Jim looks good; he's clearly gained weight. Of course, he's still thin, but looks a lot better than he did: 

Ellen came in, as promised, and we three chatted for a bit: 

(I don't know why the pictures are not sharp.)

From there, we went to a furniture store, as I'm looking for a small bureau to fit a particular place in my bedroom. Didn't find one I wanted, but saw this table and would love to have it for the T.V. in the living room: 

However, I want to think it over and may or may not.... 

After that, we stopped at Home Goods and El bought a very pretty lamp for her guest room. Poor El hadn't had lunch, so we stopped at Hawaiian BBQ and she got a big salad--I shared some of it.

Home, El helped me with some financial stuff, then we said goodbye. Today, I meet with Suzy about the acting class and no, I still haven't decided how I'll handle it, notwithstanding what I wrote before.

STAY TUNED FOR THE EXCITING CONCLUSION OF "WILL SHE DO OR WILL SHE WON'T?"

TUESDAY AND A DILEMMA

Did a bleach wash when I got up, called the facility where Jim lives and alerted them that I'd be over today and will bring Jim lunch. I was taken aback to hear they have lunch at 10:30. Told them okay, then called Ellen to let her know to come early. She's okay with the timing and said she'll pick me up at 10:00. I was delighted to hear that Chris, the contractor, was installing the kitty doors on her addition as we spoke; can't wait to see it. 

I made a date with Zak Dental for teeth cleaning next Wednesday and called SCAN Transportation to take me.  Spent several hours on my debit card problem and can't seem to straighten out it out. I'm going to have to make an appointment with the bank and meet with somebody.

I looked up the on-line listing for Suzy's and my acting workshop and was surprised to see only Suzy's name on the description. I remember that Maria, the Help of Ojai contact, emailed us to ask if we wanted our names in and I was sure I had responded in the affirmative; now I'm wondering if I forgot. If so, this oversight may be providential anyway because, frankly, I've getting apprehensive about the class. 

There are several reasons: I've always conducted acting workshops by myself and I'm not sure whether I want to do it with someone else, especially if it's not clear who does what, Also, I don't like the time, which is set for 1:00 to 3:00, every two weeks for the rest of the year. The length of the sessions is okay, I guess, but only twice a month?  I think that breaks the continuity.  In addition, it's a drag to have to get the Access Van there and back.  

The major consideration: My physical condition has been worsening and I've been getting fatigued lately. A daily nap helps, but I think the energy lapse is significant. In addition, my balance is worsening and I'm using the cane almost all the time, even when I'm home. (And there's another possible physical problem, which I don't want to mention here until I see the doctor.) 

What I plan to do tomorrow when I meet with Suzy is tell her I want to withdraw as an equal partner in the class. If she's agreeable, I'm willing what do what we discussed before when I expressed doubts: act as a kind of "visiting artist," (Suzy's phrase) and address the group once or twice. Suzy had suggested this when I  when expressed reservations. 

With all that said, I'm still not sure I want to withdraw--maybe Suzy and I can work something out. 

MONDAY

It's funny how quickly your attitude and emotions can change in only part of a day. When I got up, I was edgy and nervous for no particular reason that I could think of--kind of downhearted, too. I came close to skipping Soaring Spirits, but decided I'd go. I had intended, as usual, to walk down Victoria Avenue to Telephone Road, then take the 11 bus to Stone Fire Grille. Instead, I just walked over to the bus stop and rode it to Telephone. I had some difficulty getting off and the bus driver had to help me.

By the time I got to the restaurant, I was tired and feeling very low, as it was already almost 12:30. There were eight of us, including Gayle, who's been ill, Susan, Gayle, Renee,  Lewellen, and Georgia. The one I wanted to see, though, was darling Vera. I told her some things about which I'm concerned. My spirits lifted after I chatted with her. She had to leave to go back to work and I stayed talking with the rest of my tribe, then bused to the transit center and from there, home.

Got in and didn't nap, but watched more about the royal family (I must be nuts).  Suzanne came over, having gotten home from Idaho. and we had a good, catch-up talk. She asked if I wanted to go to WinCo this morning, but I really don't need anything. I gave her a bag of food containers for her to take to the Catholic Charities food kitchen where she volunteers. Also gave her the avocados and the other produce, which she told me are papayas. 

Sent Sally's son, Duane, a reminiscence about Sally when we were kids, which I think he'll read at her memorial, which is next Tuesday. I'm sorry I can't go, but just don't feel up to it.  

Had a terribly restless night, getting up twice, but I'm going to take a nap today. I plan to visit Jim today--Ellen will take me, although she doesn't want to go in. I'll bring him lunch, eat with him, then she'll pick me back up. 

POKEY SUNDAY

Nothing much going on except the usual Sunday med and bed sheets change--swallowed the former and accomplished the latter. After breakfast, I used my good ol' Chop Wizard to stir-fry the three large green peppers. I then stir-fried the onions and peppers and oh boy, did I have a lot. I put them in a container and stowed them in the freezer; I'll make ground turkey stir-fry as soon as I buy the turkey. 

Started the Sunday crossword, but only did about a quarter of it. Somehow, I no longer enjoy it as much as I used to. Made up a big salad for lunch and ate on the patio. I switched around the two small tables out there (isn't that exciting news😴?), then took a short nap. Got up to shower and wash my hair. 

Soaring Spirits lunch today and I just noticed I have a Quest appointment (routine blood work) on Friday at 7:10 am. Darn, I'll have go before T.O.P.S., but that should be okay. I'm always pleased that Quest is inside Von's. just across the side street from here.

Slept well, which is always good news. 

SATURDAY

Did a large color wash before breakfast, then finished my straightening up. Incredibly, where I cleaned the carpet with my own stuff, it still looks good. That makes me think I should change my mind about cancelling my check to the carpet non-cleaners after all, but oh, the hell with it.

Went to Von's for fresh veggies and fruit and when I walked out, I found these at my door: 

I recognized the avocados, but can't quite remember what the other ones are--papayas? some kind of squash? ugli fruit?  

They were certainly from Mike, upstairs, who's an accountant with an avocado company in Santa Paula. I separated them and gave a third to Vickie; Suzanne won't be home until Monday and I'll save hers until then. I left Vickie's at her door and she called me her thanks. I was amused when she asked what the larger ones are. Hey, that makes two ignorant east-coasters (she's from Maine).

Back from Von's, I put stuff away, then made a tuna sandwich, poured my IPA, and enjoyed lunch on the patio. It was sunny and nicely warm, and I enjoyed it:

My little rose bush is thriving, too: 

I ate, then still on the patio, I impulsively called Muckie. I was delighted to hear her voice, as she hadn't answered the last few times I called her. We had a good, good talk; I knew she had been in the hospital a while ago and she told me she had been in rehab after there. We're honest with each other--we don't pretend she doesn't have terminal cancer and or that I'm happy to be 88 years old and with a balance problem.  I'm so glad she's still alive, but was a bit alarmed to hear she weighs only 105 pounds. We'll talk again soon. Later, I called Stella just to see how she's doing. Okay, but still trying to decide where to move--or if she'll move. 

After, I tackled my food prep. The produce I had bought were apple, onions, and green peppers. I spent able an hour and a half coring and seasoning, and baking the five apples, help one out for today, then froze the others. I then dealt with the very large onions, chopping most and julienning the rest. I stored them separately in the fridge and will fry, then freeze to add to ground turkey; I'll do the same with the green peppers today.   

Called Ellen--she and Greg had just had dinner at Sea Fresh) to tell her I had cleaned the carpet myself and we discussed the question of me cancelling the check. She thinks I can do it only after they cash it. Think I'll call the bank and ask them. I'll save out an avocado for her, too. Called Stella just to say hello and we chatted.

I've been wanting to get into town,  and I'm free today, so maybe I'll go.  I have Soaring Spirits lunch on Monday. Sally's memorial is tomorrow, but I won't be going. I really don't want to travel a total of six hours back and forth to Cardiff--I'm just so glad I was able to be at her ninetieth in January . Ellen's taking me to see Jim on Wednesday, and I'm meeting with Suzy on Thursday about our acting class, so the calendar's filling up again. 

FRIDAY

 T.O.P.S.: another disaster, but I'm not too upset over it. At home, I added 1.06 pounds to 132.4--I should be upset, but at the meeting, I was 133.1, a gain of only .09, so I persuaded myself it was insignificant. Does that make sense? Okay, not really.

I spent a lot of time--finally--finishing up putting things away after the so-called carpet cleaning. And this just kills me: I went over the areas on which the guy did such a lousy job, treated it with carpet cleaner I bought. and it looks considerably better. Now I'm sorry I didn't stop payment on the check, but damn, I'm not going to obsess over it.  

The above took several hours, as I cleaned and straightened up otherwise, too. Had a combined lunch and dinner--a sandwich and an IPA--at 6:00, then took a hour's nap. That's okay, it's now 7:30 pm and I feel refreshed. 

Got a notice from Duane about Sally's memorial gathering. It will be in Cardiff (the California one, of course, not Jersey) on October 13 and attendees are asked to wear blue and tell a "Sally story." I'd love to go, but don't know if I can--will get more information and think about it.

THURSDAY AND THE PANAMA CANAL

I was pleased when Ellen called to say she'd come earlier, so we could lunch together. She got here at 12:30 and we spent an hour or so getting things back in order. It still isn't finished, but I can easily handle the rest.

After that, we went to Wood Ranch for lunch. We both love their big salads and she got a BBQ with chicken, I an Asian and we both some to take home. We then went to Wal-Mart and I got some staples, while Ellen bought a full-length mirror and some "Chrystal Kitty Litter" (oh, don't even ask.) 

I was thrilled when Ellen said she had signed up to take a Law of Attraction ten-day cruise in March. The Law of Attraction is a philosophy, sometimes considered a spiritual belief, that suggests you can attract positive or negative experiences into your life by focusing your thoughts and feelings on them. Hey, it seems to me that makes a lot more sense than a lot of beliefs people swear by, including religion. Esther Hicks, widow of  one of the leaders of the organization (sect?), runs the cruises and be the major speaker. Exciting! 

T.O.P.S. leader, Lennie, called to say she that once again, she won't be at the meeting this morning, as she has to take her husband to his eye appointment. This is the third week in a row she has to skip, so I trust we'll just weigh in. 

Yay, slept well, all way to 6:15, and I'm happy about that.