I'm happy to say I think the Dramamine worked. I did get up about 1:00 for my usual trek to the WC, but fell back asleep quickly and didn't wake up until 5:15. I feel rested and fit and, happily, am coming out of my slump. (Thanks, Betty.)
Looking forward to taking Susan out for lunch with Barb H. today. S.'s birthday was in March, but we're all fine with being a little late. I'm going to make Molloy's Irish Creme for Susan, too.
Yesterday was okay. Was able to get some stuff done I've been putting off, such as certain paperwork, mounds of which are always waiting. Also, washed several loads of clothes (we're either incredibly dirty or the cleanest people in town) and generally, stayed busy. For me, it's fatal to be inactive.
Had baked chicken for dinner, rubbed with Emeril's "Original Essence." Damn, it was good. Of course, everything tastes good when you're dieting.
Went for my usual drive after dinner (so I'm not sitting in front of the T.V., which is a signal for me to snack) and Ellen called on the cell phone. I pulled over on Radio Road and we talked for an hour! She calls every Sunday and it's always so good chatting with her. This time we talked mostly about 1.) the credit card industry, godforsaken creeps that they are, and what the criminals in the White House let them get away with (what did Christ say about the moneychangers?) ; 2) politics in general. Ellen attended a meeting for Obama in Thousand Oaks and may get active.
Okay, Ellen--maybe he can win. He's sure as hell better than Hillary, who's in denial she doesn't have a prayer.

I lost another 2.2 pounds, I'm happy to say. Counting from March 18, that's 7.4 pounds off. I have a long way to go, but now I can look forward to getting into the 180's, as well as the 10-pounds off milestone. I do have to remember that this is after 10 days, not 7. I'll resume going on Thursdays and have to be reconciled to not losing then.
Told Pat I'd like to have fish more often and he's okay with it as long as it's flounder for him, so I gave him that and I had my usual salmon .
I rented the DVD "The Queen" and we watched it last night. Enjoyed it--I hadn't realized it revolved around Princess Diana's death.
I'm now thinking about buying sleeping pills. I've developed a horrible sleep--or non-sleep--pattern recently: I fall asleep easily, but wake up between 1 and 3 am to go to the bathroom, then can't get back to sleep. I toss and turn for several hours, finally drop off, then when I wake at my usual time (5 to 5:30), I want to stay in bed. What's worse is that when I'm awake in the middle of the night, I start worrying and obsessing over things and I get depressed and unhappy.
I think this is part of what I see as my unfortunate emotional cycle: I reach a high when things go wonderfully well and all seems the way it should be (see yesterday's entry), then I slide into a low and start regarding mine as a wasted life. I'm an old lady, my husband is sick, Mother's Day is coming and 3/4ths of my children won't be here, I haven't gotten the income tax done, I have to deny myself food, I don't like having the cleaners here, I still haven't finished clearing the weeds out of the flower bed, and so on and on.
Of course, it doesn't matter that nothing is different from when I was marveling over how lucky I am--attitude is everything*. The one saving grace is that I know this will pass, and I'll be able to bring myself out of it before too long.
*Look up "Richard Cory," one of my favorite lesser poems.

Great, terrific lunch with David! Just as Betty and I have a commonality of memory (we don't have to explain to each other who was who and what was what in our shared childhood), there's a lesser one with David about our Rider careers.
At Katmandu, we were happy to be seated on the deck. It was extraordinarily pleasant to sit outside in the sun next to the river in the midst of young professionals looking forward to the weekend. New state office buildings are in the same large complex (my son-in-law, Mike, works in one of them), and Katmandu is an easy walk away, so there were a lot of people there. I live in a wonderful over-55 community, and I love being retired, but there are times when I want to feel as if I have a career again, with the office, and the decisions, and most of all, the gossip, which David happily supplied.
How we talked and laughed! I got all the news--who had left (my successor, for one), who wants to leave, but can't, who should leave, but won't, plus what ill-fated projects and ventures are planned and doomed to fail, and so on.
David and I were always on the same wave-length--kindred spirits, as they say--and at one point, he said, "I miss you, Rosemary, I have nobody to bitch to," which made me feel good.
David earned his bachelor's and master's degrees in organ from Westminster Choir College, which was bought by Rider several years ago. He worked at Westminster for several years, then came to our office at Rider. He and his wife had had a nice summer home on Long Beach Island (we held several office retreats there) a hundred yards from the beach and sold it for 1.2 mil last year, so I let him pay for lunch.
After, I went to Penney's at Quakerbridge, sure I'd be thwarted here as I was at Hamilton Mall, but no!--I was able to get two outfits in black and white for the fashion show, and I like them both. Even better, I can wear the one with the dress to Chrissy's wedding.
Great day in every way.
Must go to Weight Watchers now, as I missed on Thursday because of the stress test.

I'm happy to say the stress test was a piece of cake. The only bad part was the waiting around between procedures; the whole thing took about 3 hours. I was most apprehensive about the sensation of my heart racing after I got the medication, but no such thing happened. After one technician put in an IV line, she took pictures of the heart at rest. Later, she did it after the exercise part. In between, you drink several glasses of water (have no idea why), and the nurse does an EKG. The doctor comes in for the actual recording of the blood flow, presumably because you're then injected with "the stuff." I was surprised when they asked if I could walk and I'm still puzzled as to why my doctor ordered the chemical, not the treadmill, test. When I mentioned that to the cardiologist, he had me do what I think was a modified version, putting me on the treadmill for a few minutes. However, it was set at a very slow pace. Susan and I go at a brisk clip during our morning walk and this was glacial.
Anyway, they were all very nice at Cardio Diagnostics. I bemoaned the fact I wasn't able to have my coffee that morning, and Karen, the tech, even made a pot and brought me a cup in the middle--guess it's the first part that disallows caffeine.
Went back to Penney's after and had no more luck at finding anything for the fashion show. After I meet David for lunch, I'm going to the one at Quakerbridge Mall in Lawrence. If I can't find a decent dress or skirt there, I'm going to tell Bea I'd rather not do it this year. Next year, I'll be able to shop in the misses department and will climb back on the runway!
Stopped at Catherine's, a shop that specializes in larger sizes, and got a great black and red shirt, which I'll wear today over a red shell and black pants. Their sizes go way up to about 5 or 6x and I'm in 1x, but they usually have a nice array of tops in the "smaller" (all things are relative, right?) sizes. They're pricey, but have terrific stuff there. Even better, they're styled for chubs--for instance, the sleeves on my new shirt go to the elbow with nice little cuffs on them and the shirt is a bit longer than the skimpy ones the size 10s wear. Of course, I always have problems with pants, all of which have to be hemmed, but otherwise, I like this place.
I like it so much, I hope never to have to shop there again after a few more months of Weight Watchers.

Went up to Fort Dix to see Pat's doctor and, as we assumed, there's nothing new on the health end. It was actually a pleasant drive, up through the farmlands and small-town outskirts of rural Jersey, and we enjoyed it.
Had a nice long chat with Betty, who sounds good and is feeling great. So glad her ordeal is over.
E-mailed Alison to ask if she wanted to go with me to the tag sale at the Sands Casino over the weekend. (It actually costs $10 to get in--what new wrinkle is this, anyway? Ten bucks to look over a bunch of high-priced, second-hand junk? But I'm going to pay it, aren't I?) Alison worked at the Sands for several years and met her first husband there, so I thought she might enjoy it.
I wanted to sleep later today (asked Pat to set the alarm for 6:00), but woke, as usual, at 5:00. I can't have coffee or anything to eat, so just have to wait it out until I leave for the stress test about 6:45. I'm supposed to be there at 7:45, but know I'll probably be early, which I'm notorious for being.
Made stewed chicken in the crock pot and it was so good. Had chicken left, so I sliced it down for the sandwich I'm taking to the stress test.
I may seem cool and collected about today, but I'm not--I'm very nervous. Will tell all tomorrow.

I just had a dreadful, horrible, heart-stopping experience and I'm still shaking. When I walked into the study just now, I found an huge, enormous, gigantic spider sitting there under the chair just looking at me. Tried to get it with a magazine, it skittered away--and this thing was fast!--behind the bookcase. I got the Raid, sprayed into the gap, and fervently HOPE I got him. I HATE THOSE THINGS!
However--living here in the woods, more or less, guess we have to share space with them.
Enjoyed seeing Mary Jane H. yesterday. We were going to meet at Panini Bay, but she called me to say she was there (early) and it was closed. Changed it to Debra's Dreamboat (or something) at the Tuckerton Emporium. We both had the crab cake platter, which Debra herself recommended as appropriate for Weight Watchers: Excellent, no-filler crab cakes, arugala salad, and steamed vegetables.
Mary Jane and I hadn't seen each other for a year or so, but easily fell back into the roles of women who have a lot in common in the husband/children and "moved to Ocean County" sense. We stayed talking at the restaurant until almost 2:00, then she came over to the house and we did the same until she left after 4:00.
We go up to Fort Dix today at 1:00 to see Pat's primary for no reason whatever; nothing is new and Dr. S. won't do anything but go through the motiions. It's okay, though, because it's a nice day for a drive...
A nice day?! That's what revives the spiders around here, ugh, ugh, ugh! Okay, my Raid's handy, right on the desk, and I'm ready for um! However--if I don't post tomorrow, you know I was too slow with the spray and they got me...

Well, it was just a wasted day yesterday. I went to Penney's to try to find something to wear for the fashion show on May 23rd--do you think I could? Ha! Unfortunately, I've had to shop in "Women's" in recent years because this tubby little figure has somehow replaced my long, lean, svelte, goddess-like...oh, the hell with it, I'm short and fat.
Anyway, I rediscovered why I never go to Penney's: Their styles are ugly, their fabrics cheap and flimsy, and all their stuff is designed to make you look bad. I tried on outfit after outfit and they were horrid. Finally decided the best of a bad lot was a skirt and two matching tops in black and white. Made a mental note to go back and try them on again (we're not supposed to give the salesperson our selections for the show until next week) and left in an annoyed mood. Now I still haven't gotten anything to wear for Chrissy's wedding AND have to search out something for the show.
The rest of the day was nice. Just puttered around, went to Acme, ran into some neighbors and chatted, and enjoyed the incredible summery weather. It must have been 80 and so sunny--my favorite kind of day. After dinner, I went to Manahawkin and got a few things at Wal-Mart, but was disappointed again when I got home to hear that Patrick had called. Pat said he'd call again Wednesday night.
The rest of the week and most of next week are almost filled. I'm meeting former colleague, Mary Jane H., for lunch today at Panini Bay, and tomorrow, we have to go to Pat's primary at Fort Dix. Thursday, I'm taking the infamous stress test--ugh!-- and on Friday, I'll drive up to the Rider area to meet David P., former fellow manager in HR (he's info systems), for lunch. I'm planning to go to the Penney's up there in Lawrence to see if they have anything better than the crap in Hamilton Mall, but I'm not too optimistic.
But you know what? I'm actually in a buoyant mood.